Great excitement this morning.
A hot air balloon landed on our property this morning. Shortly afterward, a cavalcade of cars arrived to collect the adventurers and paraphernalia.
They did not stay for coffee... reckon they've been shot at too many times.
Hmmmm.
Sunday, 16 September 2007
Whine, whine, whine.
My Mom has a Aanhanger. For those who don't know, an Aanhanger is an adult dependant who should know better than to take advantage. Aanhangers like to hook up with soft hearted folk who should know better than to get taken in.
Anyway, Mom pours Aanhanger a glass of good wine. Aanhanger complains that the wine is not fine and suggests Mom buy a cheaper sort in the future. Mom suggests Aanhanger buy his own wine in future.
Aanhanger did not like this at all but liked it even less when Mom removed the full glass and poured it down the drain.
Annhanger has not whined nor wined since.
Go Mom!
Anyway, Mom pours Aanhanger a glass of good wine. Aanhanger complains that the wine is not fine and suggests Mom buy a cheaper sort in the future. Mom suggests Aanhanger buy his own wine in future.
Aanhanger did not like this at all but liked it even less when Mom removed the full glass and poured it down the drain.
Annhanger has not whined nor wined since.
Go Mom!
Saturday, 08 September 2007
Oh what a tangled web we weave..
Half Pint returned home from school this weekend... with braided hair.
Now I'm not referring to a single plait or even two Pippy Langkous plaits. Nope. I'm talking braided as only our chocolate sisters can do it. Minuscule braids of a few strands tightly woven on the scalp. I should mention at this point that Half Pint is vanilla and has naturally wavy blond hair that usually reached midpoint down her back.
OMG it took ages to undo this. Half Pint hit notes most Sopranos don't reach.
I think rweq...
At this point (a week ago), an incident happened. Spilt Coffee 1, Keyboard 0.
Keybo@rd h@d to go to ICU. B@by @ h@s not recovered so USB keyboard has stepped in to assist.
Anyway, Braid Bunny turned into Frizzy Lizzy. Half a bottle of silicone spray later and her hair was back to normal.
Half Pint casually mentioned that "maybe she should cut her hair short". The deceitful, wicked, conniving parents jumped at this opportunity and booked an appointment before she changed her mind.
This week, Half Pint sports a lovely, really short, curly style... and not a braid in site.
Cost - R40 for cut and R30 for styling gel.
Savings - no clips, hairties, tantrums and my sanity.
Now I'm not referring to a single plait or even two Pippy Langkous plaits. Nope. I'm talking braided as only our chocolate sisters can do it. Minuscule braids of a few strands tightly woven on the scalp. I should mention at this point that Half Pint is vanilla and has naturally wavy blond hair that usually reached midpoint down her back.
OMG it took ages to undo this. Half Pint hit notes most Sopranos don't reach.
I think rweq...
At this point (a week ago), an incident happened. Spilt Coffee 1, Keyboard 0.
Keybo@rd h@d to go to ICU. B@by @ h@s not recovered so USB keyboard has stepped in to assist.
Anyway, Braid Bunny turned into Frizzy Lizzy. Half a bottle of silicone spray later and her hair was back to normal.
Half Pint casually mentioned that "maybe she should cut her hair short". The deceitful, wicked, conniving parents jumped at this opportunity and booked an appointment before she changed her mind.
This week, Half Pint sports a lovely, really short, curly style... and not a braid in site.
Cost - R40 for cut and R30 for styling gel.
Savings - no clips, hairties, tantrums and my sanity.
Wednesday, 05 September 2007
Euthanasia
Found this interesting article on News24 on Euthanasia, written by Isla Rechner.
I've taken liberties in copying some of the article.
The controversial topic of euthanasia has invoked strong feelings from approving and disapproving parties for years, even centuries. The question is that of its true justification or of its dismissals as an ethical practice.
Euthanasia comes from the Greek words eu and thatos, which roughly translate into English as "good death". It is the practice of ending the life of a terminally ill patient in a minimally painful way, as opposed to the incurable illness ending the patient's life in an agonising way.
There are three classifications of euthanasia. Passive euthanasia is withholding treatment from a patient knowing that it will most likely result in the death of the patient.
Non-aggressive euthanasia is performed by the removal of the patient's life support.
Aggressive euthanasia, by far the most controversial, is the purposive act of administering a lethal substance resulting in the forced death of a patient.
People have various reasons for approving of euthanasia. These include considering the quality of life of the patient and if it warrants continuation of living, as well as the free will of the patient on whether to decide to continue living in their condition, or to end their life on their terms.
The argument against euthanasia considers the factors that it is immoral and a form of suicide in most belief systems. It is also disputed that euthanasia can only be voluntary if the patient is mentally competent enough to make that decision.
This debate was highlighted by the case of Terry Schiavo of Florida, America. She was a relatively healthy woman before 1990, when she collapsed and suffered from cardiac and respiratory arrest. The lack of oxygen while she was being resuscitated lead her to being brain damaged and dependent on a feeding tube.
A complex issue
After years of attempted rehabilitation with no success, her husband decided that it would be in the best interest of his wife to remove her life support, a view vehemently opposed by her parents. The matter went to the courts, resulting in many years of petitions and appeals filed by the husband and the parents.
It was in these courts that it was realised that Terry Schiavo would not have wished to remain in her condition with no hope of recovery. On the 18th of March 2005, her feeding tube was removed. She died on the 31st of March 2005.
Euthanasia is a complex issue riddled with aspects specific to an individual's belief system and moral ethics. One needs to explore all avenues of this matter before casting judgement on it.
It should also be ensured that their wishes are heard and understood before they are not mentally competent enough to make the decision themselves. You never know if your life will be another person's decision.
This topic brought back painful memories for me. My late father had terminal cancer. He refused chemotherapy and invasive surgery. Chemo is painful and dibilitating. Same for surgery. He would get no benefit, only pain. He also signed a DNR (Do Not Resusitate). We watched him wither away physically for 8 long months. He was mentally alert all this time - even did the crossword puzzle on the day he died.
What pains me is that Dad begged to be euthanased. He was given morphine to dull the pain but not enough to end it. We contrived all sorts of schemes but I could not do it. Not because I didn't want to but because it is illegal. We were bound by the collective morality and laws of others. His dignity was hijacked. Would you want to wear a nappy and be force fed through a feeding tube?
Nothing was gained from his suffering.
I'd like to know what your opinion on this is.
I've taken liberties in copying some of the article.
The controversial topic of euthanasia has invoked strong feelings from approving and disapproving parties for years, even centuries. The question is that of its true justification or of its dismissals as an ethical practice.
Euthanasia comes from the Greek words eu and thatos, which roughly translate into English as "good death". It is the practice of ending the life of a terminally ill patient in a minimally painful way, as opposed to the incurable illness ending the patient's life in an agonising way.
There are three classifications of euthanasia. Passive euthanasia is withholding treatment from a patient knowing that it will most likely result in the death of the patient.
Non-aggressive euthanasia is performed by the removal of the patient's life support.
Aggressive euthanasia, by far the most controversial, is the purposive act of administering a lethal substance resulting in the forced death of a patient.
People have various reasons for approving of euthanasia. These include considering the quality of life of the patient and if it warrants continuation of living, as well as the free will of the patient on whether to decide to continue living in their condition, or to end their life on their terms.
The argument against euthanasia considers the factors that it is immoral and a form of suicide in most belief systems. It is also disputed that euthanasia can only be voluntary if the patient is mentally competent enough to make that decision.
This debate was highlighted by the case of Terry Schiavo of Florida, America. She was a relatively healthy woman before 1990, when she collapsed and suffered from cardiac and respiratory arrest. The lack of oxygen while she was being resuscitated lead her to being brain damaged and dependent on a feeding tube.
A complex issue
After years of attempted rehabilitation with no success, her husband decided that it would be in the best interest of his wife to remove her life support, a view vehemently opposed by her parents. The matter went to the courts, resulting in many years of petitions and appeals filed by the husband and the parents.
It was in these courts that it was realised that Terry Schiavo would not have wished to remain in her condition with no hope of recovery. On the 18th of March 2005, her feeding tube was removed. She died on the 31st of March 2005.
Euthanasia is a complex issue riddled with aspects specific to an individual's belief system and moral ethics. One needs to explore all avenues of this matter before casting judgement on it.
It should also be ensured that their wishes are heard and understood before they are not mentally competent enough to make the decision themselves. You never know if your life will be another person's decision.
This topic brought back painful memories for me. My late father had terminal cancer. He refused chemotherapy and invasive surgery. Chemo is painful and dibilitating. Same for surgery. He would get no benefit, only pain. He also signed a DNR (Do Not Resusitate). We watched him wither away physically for 8 long months. He was mentally alert all this time - even did the crossword puzzle on the day he died.
What pains me is that Dad begged to be euthanased. He was given morphine to dull the pain but not enough to end it. We contrived all sorts of schemes but I could not do it. Not because I didn't want to but because it is illegal. We were bound by the collective morality and laws of others. His dignity was hijacked. Would you want to wear a nappy and be force fed through a feeding tube?
Nothing was gained from his suffering.
I'd like to know what your opinion on this is.
Spring Bonfire
I love living in the country.
I love my neighbours.
I love Spring Bonfire.
One of the treats of not living in a townhouse complex or suburb you can only access through a boom gate, is that we actually, really, do speak with our neighbours. We don't just speak, we kuier lekker. We catch up on the skinner, discuss security, argue about sport and share food and jokes.
The kids, regardless of age, bolt into the trees and veld with torches and adventure in their hearts. Our local tree fella hauls in the dried wood collected over winter.
The blaze is ignited while the sun sets and out come the creative cooking skills. Pot bread. Stick bread. Sausages of all descriptions placed on a stick and held over the flames. Braai meat. Salads. Fruit. Nuts in skins. Marshmallows... lightly toasted and smothered with chocolate sauce.
As the stars shift overhead, the jackets come on and the younger, exhausted kids are put to bed on mattresses in the back of bakkies. The older kids gather and scare the hell out of each other with ghost stories. The adults' conversation slips to aliens, conspiracy theories, books and guns.
Eventually, we part company (with plenty hugs) and head for home and bed. Some of us only manage this at 5 in the morning (can't let a good sunrise get wasted).
Maplotters Rock!
BTW Maplotter neighbours refers to anyone who lives on a piece of land larger than a hectare within a 20km radius. Boere are the same but on a larger scale.
I love my neighbours.
I love Spring Bonfire.
One of the treats of not living in a townhouse complex or suburb you can only access through a boom gate, is that we actually, really, do speak with our neighbours. We don't just speak, we kuier lekker. We catch up on the skinner, discuss security, argue about sport and share food and jokes.
The kids, regardless of age, bolt into the trees and veld with torches and adventure in their hearts. Our local tree fella hauls in the dried wood collected over winter.
The blaze is ignited while the sun sets and out come the creative cooking skills. Pot bread. Stick bread. Sausages of all descriptions placed on a stick and held over the flames. Braai meat. Salads. Fruit. Nuts in skins. Marshmallows... lightly toasted and smothered with chocolate sauce.
As the stars shift overhead, the jackets come on and the younger, exhausted kids are put to bed on mattresses in the back of bakkies. The older kids gather and scare the hell out of each other with ghost stories. The adults' conversation slips to aliens, conspiracy theories, books and guns.
Eventually, we part company (with plenty hugs) and head for home and bed. Some of us only manage this at 5 in the morning (can't let a good sunrise get wasted).
Maplotters Rock!
BTW Maplotter neighbours refers to anyone who lives on a piece of land larger than a hectare within a 20km radius. Boere are the same but on a larger scale.
Wednesday, 29 August 2007
Spring Fever
I'm back... and fighting fit. Okay, not fighting fit but definitely vertical.
Construction has started on the house again so now I can soothe the bronchitis with cement dust, plaster sand, road dust, dog dust, veld fire soot, wood shaving. Let's not forget the rising pollen count. And to think I actually entertained the idea of giving up smoking.
While in the Spring cleaning mode, I checked out my old standby, the FlyLady. Gotta love her.
Shine your sink, put on your shoes... Unfortunately, FlyLady don't live where I do. Malplotters live in redneck heaven. I have tools and car parts in my entrance. I lost the dining table years ago. As for the actual dining room, urhm, I think its the junk pile behind the other junk pile that doubles as our lounge. Oh wait. There's a spare room, garage, store room and kraal that's also choka to bursting point. I have no clue what's in there actually.
And that's nothing compared to the stuff just lying around outside. Piles and piles of 'I dunno whats' and the required junk car too. Can't be a redneck if you don't have a scrap car parked out front, rusting away.
I would dearly love to live in my clean, almost bare, easy to maintain, piece of heaven on earth. Maybe even try my hand at some interior decorating. Okay, a fancy cushion. Okay, okay, a couch that doesn't 'wooph' dust would be nice. Ceiling boards that actually cover the ceiling would be a bonus.
FlyLady. We're a lost cause. I can't clean a thing because the stuff ain't mine to boogie.
Can't even shine my sink because it's a red plastic, warped, decomposing catastrophe.
MD - please finish the new kitchen quickly. Please, please.
And yeah, the stuff lying around really bothers me.
Pack rats. Uuurrrgghh!
Construction has started on the house again so now I can soothe the bronchitis with cement dust, plaster sand, road dust, dog dust, veld fire soot, wood shaving. Let's not forget the rising pollen count. And to think I actually entertained the idea of giving up smoking.
While in the Spring cleaning mode, I checked out my old standby, the FlyLady. Gotta love her.
Shine your sink, put on your shoes... Unfortunately, FlyLady don't live where I do. Malplotters live in redneck heaven. I have tools and car parts in my entrance. I lost the dining table years ago. As for the actual dining room, urhm, I think its the junk pile behind the other junk pile that doubles as our lounge. Oh wait. There's a spare room, garage, store room and kraal that's also choka to bursting point. I have no clue what's in there actually.
And that's nothing compared to the stuff just lying around outside. Piles and piles of 'I dunno whats' and the required junk car too. Can't be a redneck if you don't have a scrap car parked out front, rusting away.
I would dearly love to live in my clean, almost bare, easy to maintain, piece of heaven on earth. Maybe even try my hand at some interior decorating. Okay, a fancy cushion. Okay, okay, a couch that doesn't 'wooph' dust would be nice. Ceiling boards that actually cover the ceiling would be a bonus.
FlyLady. We're a lost cause. I can't clean a thing because the stuff ain't mine to boogie.
Can't even shine my sink because it's a red plastic, warped, decomposing catastrophe.
MD - please finish the new kitchen quickly. Please, please.
And yeah, the stuff lying around really bothers me.
Pack rats. Uuurrrgghh!
Wednesday, 22 August 2007
Germ Warfare continued
Still battling the germs.
Reckon my nose drip could end the drought - definitely keeping Kleenex in business.
Being ill like this is totally yuck. Even the novelty of sleeping all day while everyone else trudges to work has worn off. My house looks like a bomb has hit it... and I don't care.
Come on summer. Come on rain.
Reckon my nose drip could end the drought - definitely keeping Kleenex in business.
Being ill like this is totally yuck. Even the novelty of sleeping all day while everyone else trudges to work has worn off. My house looks like a bomb has hit it... and I don't care.
Come on summer. Come on rain.
Wednesday, 15 August 2007
Germ Warfare
Jees, I haven't posted anything for ages.
Anyway, full-on germ warfare going on in our house. It started innocently enough with "Mommy, my throat is sore" and has now culminated in the entire family being on antibiotics and everything else going to pieces. I'm no fan of antibiotics but a four day fever meant serious action. We've got the whole bang-shoot. Sinusitis, Pharyngitis, Bronchitis, Tonsilitis.
The Down Side:
Doctors bill R500. Meds R1000. Work piling up in my absence.
The Up Side:
Lots of sleep. Husky voice (very sexy). I can whistle my nose and breathe like bagpipes. I got a whole new perspective on my kitchen when a dizzy spell and fever caused me to strip and lay down on the cold tiles. Involuntary diet due to loss of appetite. Drug abuse.
Anyway, full-on germ warfare going on in our house. It started innocently enough with "Mommy, my throat is sore" and has now culminated in the entire family being on antibiotics and everything else going to pieces. I'm no fan of antibiotics but a four day fever meant serious action. We've got the whole bang-shoot. Sinusitis, Pharyngitis, Bronchitis, Tonsilitis.
The Down Side:
Doctors bill R500. Meds R1000. Work piling up in my absence.
The Up Side:
Lots of sleep. Husky voice (very sexy). I can whistle my nose and breathe like bagpipes. I got a whole new perspective on my kitchen when a dizzy spell and fever caused me to strip and lay down on the cold tiles. Involuntary diet due to loss of appetite. Drug abuse.
Sunday, 29 July 2007
Thursday, 26 July 2007
Pink gone plunk
I thought it would be a treat to take Half Pint to her first rock concert. One of her favourite artisits is Pink, who is touring SA in September.
There is one show on Saturday 8th... at Sun City. Travelling 300km (return) at night is not my idea of fun, especially when you have to share dodgy roads with drunkards.
Venue of choice is the Dome, however, the show is on the 9th. Sunday 9th. 8pm.
Now organisers - pay attention. Pink's target market is young teens. There is no way I (the Parent Person) am going to allow my kid to go to a concert on a school night. It's one of those non-negotiables.
Another non-negotiable is the ticket price. R400,00 per person? R250.00 if you want to use binoculars. You gotta be kidding! That's way out of the pocket money (pamper your kid) range. Sorry Half Pint.
There is one show on Saturday 8th... at Sun City. Travelling 300km (return) at night is not my idea of fun, especially when you have to share dodgy roads with drunkards.
Venue of choice is the Dome, however, the show is on the 9th. Sunday 9th. 8pm.
Now organisers - pay attention. Pink's target market is young teens. There is no way I (the Parent Person) am going to allow my kid to go to a concert on a school night. It's one of those non-negotiables.
Another non-negotiable is the ticket price. R400,00 per person? R250.00 if you want to use binoculars. You gotta be kidding! That's way out of the pocket money (pamper your kid) range. Sorry Half Pint.
Keep your eyes on the road, your hands upon the wheel (Jim Morrison)
I accidentally met a woman today who gives the rest of us women drivers a bad name. I stopped to assist as there was no one else around.
She had parked her car, unintentionally, in a culvert. Sedan cars aren't designed to travel over or through culverts so it came to a rapid stop. So did the drivers' face when it kissed the steering wheel. This would not have happened had she been wearing her seatbelt.
While waiting for the ambulance, I asked if she had swerved for another car, dog, whatever. She could not say. I did notice the contents of her handbag strewn all over. Guess what she was clutched in her hand? Her mascara!
Well lady, you won't be needing the mascara for the next few weeks because you're going to look like a raccoon.
She had parked her car, unintentionally, in a culvert. Sedan cars aren't designed to travel over or through culverts so it came to a rapid stop. So did the drivers' face when it kissed the steering wheel. This would not have happened had she been wearing her seatbelt.
While waiting for the ambulance, I asked if she had swerved for another car, dog, whatever. She could not say. I did notice the contents of her handbag strewn all over. Guess what she was clutched in her hand? Her mascara!
Well lady, you won't be needing the mascara for the next few weeks because you're going to look like a raccoon.
Wednesday, 18 July 2007
Need suggestions about trespassing
We can relate to the frustration expressed (see pictures below). Our latest battle is with a local who lifts our fence and sends his dogs in to hunt the rabbits and guinea fowl. His dogs obviously make our dogs go ballistic and are teaching ours about hunting, something we don't encourage because the area is a Reserve.
We also have hassles with unsupervised cattle herds crushing our fence, and everything else in their path, and destroying our garden and new trees (we're trying to rehabilitate back to bushveld).
The worst is the scumbags who cut our fences and use the wire to make snares, then plant the snares on the bokkie (buck) trails. I get homicidal thoughts finding the decomposed animals and worry about my pets.
All our farm animals were sold five years ago because of the aggressive poaching. Heartbreaking.
Any suggestions?
We also have hassles with unsupervised cattle herds crushing our fence, and everything else in their path, and destroying our garden and new trees (we're trying to rehabilitate back to bushveld).
The worst is the scumbags who cut our fences and use the wire to make snares, then plant the snares on the bokkie (buck) trails. I get homicidal thoughts finding the decomposed animals and worry about my pets.
All our farm animals were sold five years ago because of the aggressive poaching. Heartbreaking.
Any suggestions?
The ad I hate most
I cannot stomache this ad. Break out in hives and rush for the mute button everytime. Kill, Kill, Kill, Kill.
Sunday, 15 July 2007
Time to celebrate the start of the new school term.
Promised Half-Pint (my daughter) that if she cleaned her room, I'd take her to see the new Harry Potter movie. This bribe was worth every penny, if you have any experience of what a teenage room looks like after three weeks holiday. Biological experiments going crazy in the accumulated crockery that never made it back to the kitchen; clothes (I think it was just about everything she owns) decorating the floor and keeping the bed up; bottles, tins and papers - I can't explain these but they could keep a recycling firm in business for a year; stationery; toys; toiletries; towels... list getting out of hand... and the missing Jack Russell. Yep. The three days notice was necessary.
Saturday morning inspection passed. Off to Monte and the Il Grande theatre. Wow. Nice going Nu Metro. The giant (that's me) could stretch out and not break my knees or neck. The screen is huge and the movie was magical. My only gripe was the yucky popcorn and flat coke that cost a fortune. Things improved once we settled on pancakes and cappuccino's for lunch. Half Pint enjoyed the Skate Park, then we cruised Exclusive Books and spend all my gift vouchers.
BTW Spud, the Madness Continues is as brilliant as the first Spud. I can't wait for the next instalment.
Half Pint took off for the Amusement Arcade (and proved that girls can kick butt... and it was her first time in an arcade) while I moved outside to read Spud and enjoy a long awaited ciggie. While I was chillin', I noticed a couple of disturbing things. One was that the Balloon thingie has only one cable anchoring it to terra firma. Second was observing floods of prepubescent girls, dressed to the hilt, swarming around the casino sans an adult. If they're not watching movies, skating or playing games, what are they doing there? Third was watching a limo pull up and collect a half dozen 6 year olds. I was disgusted with the way they spoke to the driver (because he walked and did not run to open the door) and more disgusted with the parents (who said nothing). Who the hell hires a limo to chauffeur 6 year olds around? Even if it is the 'Princess' birthday, do some face painting, play games and eat cake. If you have spare cash, hire an entertainer and a jumping castle. Your Princess is going to grow up to be a rude 'gimme' ungrateful brat and you deserve it.
I was saddened to observe the gamblers too. They have this weird manic expression while they throw their money away. Unbelievable. Tarted pensioners and middle aged men in bad suits.
Half-Pint and I voted unanimously that, with exception of the Movies, Skate Park and Bird Park, Monte is plastic to the faux ceiling.
Next bribe opportunity, we're doing the Planetarium.
Sunday evening. Half-Pint is back at boarding school and my house is strangely quiet. I can actually hear myself sigh in relief. No radios, no TV, no rap. Bliss.
The traffic is going to be hell tomorrow.
Saturday morning inspection passed. Off to Monte and the Il Grande theatre. Wow. Nice going Nu Metro. The giant (that's me) could stretch out and not break my knees or neck. The screen is huge and the movie was magical. My only gripe was the yucky popcorn and flat coke that cost a fortune. Things improved once we settled on pancakes and cappuccino's for lunch. Half Pint enjoyed the Skate Park, then we cruised Exclusive Books and spend all my gift vouchers.
BTW Spud, the Madness Continues is as brilliant as the first Spud. I can't wait for the next instalment.
Half Pint took off for the Amusement Arcade (and proved that girls can kick butt... and it was her first time in an arcade) while I moved outside to read Spud and enjoy a long awaited ciggie. While I was chillin', I noticed a couple of disturbing things. One was that the Balloon thingie has only one cable anchoring it to terra firma. Second was observing floods of prepubescent girls, dressed to the hilt, swarming around the casino sans an adult. If they're not watching movies, skating or playing games, what are they doing there? Third was watching a limo pull up and collect a half dozen 6 year olds. I was disgusted with the way they spoke to the driver (because he walked and did not run to open the door) and more disgusted with the parents (who said nothing). Who the hell hires a limo to chauffeur 6 year olds around? Even if it is the 'Princess' birthday, do some face painting, play games and eat cake. If you have spare cash, hire an entertainer and a jumping castle. Your Princess is going to grow up to be a rude 'gimme' ungrateful brat and you deserve it.
I was saddened to observe the gamblers too. They have this weird manic expression while they throw their money away. Unbelievable. Tarted pensioners and middle aged men in bad suits.
Half-Pint and I voted unanimously that, with exception of the Movies, Skate Park and Bird Park, Monte is plastic to the faux ceiling.
Next bribe opportunity, we're doing the Planetarium.
Sunday evening. Half-Pint is back at boarding school and my house is strangely quiet. I can actually hear myself sigh in relief. No radios, no TV, no rap. Bliss.
The traffic is going to be hell tomorrow.
Wednesday, 11 July 2007
Darfur
Got together with my favourite medic mates on a short break from Darfur (in Sudan), who brought along some more medic mates. Surprisingly, we did not chat about any gross stuff but I did learn that Darfur is an experience. The food sucks and is used to poison the rats around camp. The average temperature is 52 c and turns jelly babies into liquid mush. The buildings are plastic fit-to's, which comes in handy when AU troops teach rookies how to drive armoured vehicles, which haven't been hijacked by rebels yet.
This explains why the food took precedence over the booze... and no gross stuff was discussed.
Welcome home. You can hog the heater. Chow down.
This explains why the food took precedence over the booze... and no gross stuff was discussed.
Welcome home. You can hog the heater. Chow down.
Saturday, 07 July 2007
Hit the Sirens and wake up
I'm alarmed about quite a few news items that hit the headlines this week.
- The Sharks lost to the Lions. Tragedy. At least they beat Province otherwise I'd have to dress in full mourning.
- My daughter can now obtain contraceptives and have an abortion without my knowledge or consent. Bollocks. I'll kill her first. Ok. So we talked about it. She agrees it's bollocks. I still threatened to kill her. She feels this is the better alternative and we have a new mantra. Boys are bad. Repeat.
- The crime stats are up. No surprise there but I was surprised to learn that it's my fault. Yep. Because we have taken measures to secure ourselves and our homes (at the governments' insistence), this has led to an increase in violent armed robberies and murder. We invite the $#@! to kill us. Bollocks. When public servants learn what service is, send me an invitation.
- The public service strike is over. Can't say I noticed a difference.
- We may soon be Darkest Africa. Eskom employees are going on strike. Notice how this is scheduled in the middle of winter.
World's Laziest Dog
Weekend got off to an exciting start. I passed out minutes after climbing out of a hot bath which happened minutes after I got home from work.
Then it was Saturday.
I have a Great Dane puppy (thanks MD). We adore each other. He was quite miffed because I had worked late this whole week and ignored him. I decided to treat him and take him for a smelly walk, making sure we hit the dung trails. We had gone no futher than 200m and he's caput. So the world's laziest dog and I returned home. He walked right past the water trough and collapsed on the couch. I checked him out from head to toe. Pulse fine. Breathing fine. He eats better than all the humans I know put together. We've also visited the vet to make sure he's cool. Straight A's all round. He just happens to be the world's laziest dog. My other mutts get excited over every little thing. This guy 'saunters' to his food bowl. He's bladder control is phenomenal because it's too much effort for him to get up. Have couch, touching human, will sleep.
Then it was Saturday.
I have a Great Dane puppy (thanks MD). We adore each other. He was quite miffed because I had worked late this whole week and ignored him. I decided to treat him and take him for a smelly walk, making sure we hit the dung trails. We had gone no futher than 200m and he's caput. So the world's laziest dog and I returned home. He walked right past the water trough and collapsed on the couch. I checked him out from head to toe. Pulse fine. Breathing fine. He eats better than all the humans I know put together. We've also visited the vet to make sure he's cool. Straight A's all round. He just happens to be the world's laziest dog. My other mutts get excited over every little thing. This guy 'saunters' to his food bowl. He's bladder control is phenomenal because it's too much effort for him to get up. Have couch, touching human, will sleep.
Thursday, 05 July 2007
Tuesday, 03 July 2007
Petscare
To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.
Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake aclaim for it becoming yourfood and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continuesleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using thebathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!
To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:
To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About OurPets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/ daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours anddoesn't speak clearly.
Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train ( except: Terrie r's and Shih Tsu's )
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion rand for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children
Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake aclaim for it becoming yourfood and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continuesleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using thebathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!
To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:
To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About OurPets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/ daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours anddoesn't speak clearly.
Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train ( except: Terrie r's and Shih Tsu's )
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion rand for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children
Monday, 02 July 2007
The Monday Commute
Low score today. Only three veld fires, one T-boned ambulance and two maSkoros on the side. Did get a surprise though. Got pulled over by Metro. Guess the strike is really over. Anyway, expecting the usual bribe request but, instead, got told to drive safely and make sure I come to a Complete Halt at the stop street. No fine. The stop street in question is on a back road and provides safe passage to someone's driveway (who must be hellofanimportant) and a dead end. I predict speed bumps soon followed by a boom gate. This will be the result of some poor innocent daring to stop at this stop street and getting rear ended by the queue who habitually sail though.
Special message to chap in white ford sierra skedonk. Either your car is unroadworthy or you are unroadworthy. Rapidly steering from side to side over two lanes is not normal. This is unnerving for the rest of us on the road. Go away. Scrap your car. Get a walking permit. Just get the hell off the road.
Special message to chap in white ford sierra skedonk. Either your car is unroadworthy or you are unroadworthy. Rapidly steering from side to side over two lanes is not normal. This is unnerving for the rest of us on the road. Go away. Scrap your car. Get a walking permit. Just get the hell off the road.
Sunday, 01 July 2007
Oh, the noise !
Had an awesome weekend doing absolutely nothing. Watched a marathon of five movies in one sitting, read two books, caught up on some much needed sleep and got a high score on some stupid game (I'd vowed not to play). Blame it all on the cold weather and stupid weekend driving habits of my fellow Safricans.
I wish I could tell you that my life is quiet and peaceful, but, sadly, this is not true. MD has been testing his home-built sound system and Daughter Dearest has ambitions of becoming either a pop star or talk show host. They've retired to bed (think the sleeping pills I spiked their food with worked) and I'm now sitting by the blazing fire, cats weighing down the obligatory blanket and looking forward to going to work to get away from the noise.
Please add ear muffs to my wish list.
I wish I could tell you that my life is quiet and peaceful, but, sadly, this is not true. MD has been testing his home-built sound system and Daughter Dearest has ambitions of becoming either a pop star or talk show host. They've retired to bed (think the sleeping pills I spiked their food with worked) and I'm now sitting by the blazing fire, cats weighing down the obligatory blanket and looking forward to going to work to get away from the noise.
Please add ear muffs to my wish list.
Wednesday, 27 June 2007
Bite Me
My boss is one of a kind (or maybe not). I've been under the weather for a few days and, yesterday, decided to end my martyr mode and stay in bed... which I should have done ages ago. Back at work today. No words of consolation, commiseration or empathy. Nope. I was simply reminded to fill in my leave form. You can feel the love.
My boss enjoys nothing more than finding an excuse to kak me out for something. I play being the fall-guy and then proving my boss wrong. It's not a game I choose to play but, hey, what do you do when you're on the field? You stick to the rules and kick butt. You can feel the love.
My boss enjoys nothing more than finding an excuse to kak me out for something. I play being the fall-guy and then proving my boss wrong. It's not a game I choose to play but, hey, what do you do when you're on the field? You stick to the rules and kick butt. You can feel the love.
Snow what !!!
Huge excitement today. It snowed in Joburg. MD phones to make sure I catch the spectacle. Keep in mind that I've never seen real snow. I rush outside - nothing. Drive to work - nothing. Not a snowflake. Not a patch of white. Nada, nothing, zip. Everyone arrives late at the office because... they've been taking photos and playing in the snow. The biggest patch of ice I saw was the one on my windscreen.
This evening, MD gives me an ice ball in a plastic packet - my token snowball. That sucks.
I was VERY tempted to throw it at him... but I'm a pacifist.
So. For the Record. I have still not seen nor touched REAL SNOW.
Oh. Special message for crackpot who drives Audi. I'm guessing you've now learnt that throwing boiling water on your windscreen was not a crackerjack move.
This evening, MD gives me an ice ball in a plastic packet - my token snowball. That sucks.
I was VERY tempted to throw it at him... but I'm a pacifist.
So. For the Record. I have still not seen nor touched REAL SNOW.
Oh. Special message for crackpot who drives Audi. I'm guessing you've now learnt that throwing boiling water on your windscreen was not a crackerjack move.
Sunday, 24 June 2007
Bigfoot
I need to Upgrade my bakkie like this. It would make my commute so much more fun, especially when the taxis try to cut me off or stop suddenly.
Pot holes (yeah, those slag gates) won't be a problem anymore.
Undercover parking could be a challenge.
Bite me.
Familiar Faces
The Koeksisters got together again, this time with some new faces. I met my second cousins for the first time. No doubt that they are family. We all look alike and share outsized feet. It was also strange to share stories and realise we have similar perceptions and experiences.
I hope to see a lot more of them in the future.
I hope to see a lot more of them in the future.
Friday, 22 June 2007
Aaarrrggghhhh - School Holidays
The great thing about school holidays is the less congested traffic. Uummm, Yep. That's about it.
The brat is back from boarding school. Yes, I'm one of those cruel parents you read about. Actually, she digs boarding school. If it's cool for Harry Potter and Spud, it's cool for her. Now I just pray my washing machine lasts the week, my house lasts two weeks, my bank overdraft lasts three weeks and my patience lasts 10 minutes. The phone bill is not up for discussion - THERE IS NO PHONE. The dictator has spoken.
It took Miss Sassy less than one hour to get marching orders to her room. I know the routine. We'll repeat this pattern on a non random basis until forever. Teenage girls!!! And I was an angel. Honest. Ask my Mom. Ya, the one who concussed me with the breadboard.
The brat is back from boarding school. Yes, I'm one of those cruel parents you read about. Actually, she digs boarding school. If it's cool for Harry Potter and Spud, it's cool for her. Now I just pray my washing machine lasts the week, my house lasts two weeks, my bank overdraft lasts three weeks and my patience lasts 10 minutes. The phone bill is not up for discussion - THERE IS NO PHONE. The dictator has spoken.
It took Miss Sassy less than one hour to get marching orders to her room. I know the routine. We'll repeat this pattern on a non random basis until forever. Teenage girls!!! And I was an angel. Honest. Ask my Mom. Ya, the one who concussed me with the breadboard.
Thursday, 21 June 2007
Bloody Facebook
Spending way too much time searching and chatting. It's crazy mon. My brain is seizing up. I'm putting myself on Facebook diet.
Wonder if they have a group for this? Gotta go check... see ya later.
Wonder if they have a group for this? Gotta go check... see ya later.
Monday, 18 June 2007
Almost killed by someone else's STUPIDITY
I am SO MAD but happy to still be in the land of the living and being able to write this.
Driving home from work today. Single lane traffic. White Golf in front followed by overlong articulated truck followed by empty brick transport truck (type with crane) and then myself. Traffic moving slowly so when the road opens up to two lanes, the Golf and articulated keep left and I follow the brick truck on the right, both of us accelerating to pass. The Golf (@$$hole) decides to turn right (yeah, from the left lane), no indicator (naturally) and stops dead in our lane because there is oncoming traffic. Brick truck and myself hit brakes. Have to because we can't move left or right. The brick truck's backend sways from side to side. I'm still treading the brakes to the floor, tap style to avoid a skid, changing down super quick, somehow manage to hit the emergency lights too and preparing handbrake... then the articulated truck swerves onto sand shoulder to avoid swerving brick truck. I sense the impending jackknife but, miraculously, the driver accelerates out of it. Engines screaming, tires squealing, dust and smoke. Unbelievably, the motorists behind see what's happening and fall back. @$$hole is oblivious to this scenario and still parked sideways (no, I don't know why), sans indicators, in our lane. I stopped a metre behind the brick truck. Whew! The articulated moves on and the traffic behind allows me to pass on the left. When I do pass, I see the brick truck has managed to stop a balls hair from the Golf, who is still unaware of the 5m high 20 ton truck, now less a couple inches of rubber, kissing his right side.
Here's the punch. The road that @$$hole wants to turn into is a one way... yes, you guessed right.
Will the guys that developed ABS brakes please accept my prayer of thanks.
Ditto those patient dudes that put up with me every so often at Advanced Driving school.
Ditto the two truck drivers that kept it cool.
As for the @$$hole in the white Golf... if you want to commit suicide, do it at home. I hate you.
BTW did you know you don't get insurance discount anymore for Advanced Driving?
Driving home from work today. Single lane traffic. White Golf in front followed by overlong articulated truck followed by empty brick transport truck (type with crane) and then myself. Traffic moving slowly so when the road opens up to two lanes, the Golf and articulated keep left and I follow the brick truck on the right, both of us accelerating to pass. The Golf (@$$hole) decides to turn right (yeah, from the left lane), no indicator (naturally) and stops dead in our lane because there is oncoming traffic. Brick truck and myself hit brakes. Have to because we can't move left or right. The brick truck's backend sways from side to side. I'm still treading the brakes to the floor, tap style to avoid a skid, changing down super quick, somehow manage to hit the emergency lights too and preparing handbrake... then the articulated truck swerves onto sand shoulder to avoid swerving brick truck. I sense the impending jackknife but, miraculously, the driver accelerates out of it. Engines screaming, tires squealing, dust and smoke. Unbelievably, the motorists behind see what's happening and fall back. @$$hole is oblivious to this scenario and still parked sideways (no, I don't know why), sans indicators, in our lane. I stopped a metre behind the brick truck. Whew! The articulated moves on and the traffic behind allows me to pass on the left. When I do pass, I see the brick truck has managed to stop a balls hair from the Golf, who is still unaware of the 5m high 20 ton truck, now less a couple inches of rubber, kissing his right side.
Here's the punch. The road that @$$hole wants to turn into is a one way... yes, you guessed right.
Will the guys that developed ABS brakes please accept my prayer of thanks.
Ditto those patient dudes that put up with me every so often at Advanced Driving school.
Ditto the two truck drivers that kept it cool.
As for the @$$hole in the white Golf... if you want to commit suicide, do it at home. I hate you.
BTW did you know you don't get insurance discount anymore for Advanced Driving?
Sunday, 17 June 2007
Another year older and deeper in debt.
Time to reflect
Things I don’t want to do
Bungee jump
Be in a large crowd
Go to jail
Things I’d like to do
Travel overseas
Touch real snow
Enjoy a honeymoon
Experience a spa pamper session with the works
Give up smoking
Write a best selling book
Own and drive a ‘green’ car
Hold my grandchild
Things I don’t want to do again
Get motherless drunk
Getting taken for granted
Get in serious debt
Abseiling
Face an elephants stampede and the car won’t start
Being shot at or hijacked
Being assaulted by bereaved parent
Having to call the cops
Delivering another sick baby and the mom is dying of AIDS
Things I’m glad I did although it was tough
Being a foster Mom
Training as an Emergency Medic
Leaving an abusive relationship
Taking responsibility for serious debt and paying off every last cent, interest included.
Ran a marathon
Leaving a bad, destructive job with no new job ready and waiting
Confronting alcoholic family
Euthenizing our badly injured and sick animals
Saying NO and sticking with it
And the Best
My friend, partner, husband (not enough words to describe this awesome man)
My daughter (melts my heart and pushes my buttons)
My mom (my anchor, the strongest woman I know)
Being nuzzled so gently by a wild giraffe
Being adored and weighed down by our dogs and cats
Laughing with friends, usually into the wee hours of the morning
Wednesday, 13 June 2007
Someone, please prescribe me Dormican
I am beyond tired. This is ridiculous.
Only left work at 8pm last night because the West Wing wanted information but could not quite communicate what information they wanted. Too exhausted to tap my psychic abilities, I used the tried and trusted technique - give them EVERYTHING. Hopefully, now that they have Everything, they'll leave me alone for a while.
No sooner had I collected take-out dinner (again) when the calls came in. Shooting. Another neighbour. She is out of theatre and in ICU. Critical but stable. The $#@!, known on politically correct parlance as 'the perpetrators', ran from the scene and then shot a motorist and passenger. Nothing was taken at any of these scenes. No further news.
Only got to bed after 1am.
My 2c. Theft was not a motive. These are terrorists. They are carrying heavy calibre, targeting their victims when they know they are home (dinner time).
Vent over. Off to bed. Good night.
Only left work at 8pm last night because the West Wing wanted information but could not quite communicate what information they wanted. Too exhausted to tap my psychic abilities, I used the tried and trusted technique - give them EVERYTHING. Hopefully, now that they have Everything, they'll leave me alone for a while.
No sooner had I collected take-out dinner (again) when the calls came in. Shooting. Another neighbour. She is out of theatre and in ICU. Critical but stable. The $#@!, known on politically correct parlance as 'the perpetrators', ran from the scene and then shot a motorist and passenger. Nothing was taken at any of these scenes. No further news.
Only got to bed after 1am.
My 2c. Theft was not a motive. These are terrorists. They are carrying heavy calibre, targeting their victims when they know they are home (dinner time).
Vent over. Off to bed. Good night.
Monday, 11 June 2007
Monday, what can I say :{
No hot water for starters. But. I'm an old hand at living maplotter style so it was out with the gas and 'voila!', one hot bath with bubbles and a lekker cup of coffee for good measure. Still made it to work on time.
Work, work, work,. (the commas are my legit smoke breaks)
Offered security chap a lift home and, on route, got a call from MD (Minister of Defense; Medical Director, Major Dad, My Darling) that he was taking young patient to Unitas. Got home, fed dogs, shoved a cheese roll in my face, started laundry (um, this list gets long), when MD called and explained he was stranded at Unitas - his car was at patients house. Mad dash to hospital sans sirens. Finally got to put my feet up only after 9pm... and missed half of CSI.
At this rate, I could go into sleep therapy for two years and still not have caught up.
Patient will recover quickly.
Can't say the same for my bank balance (that should read deficit). EVERYBODY has decided to have a birthday, going away, house warming, mid winter, whatever thang this month. Me included. Darn.
If you're considering getting me a pressie, my wish list includes Nytol, Sleepeeze and a comfy pillow. No alarm clocks.
Work, work, work,. (the commas are my legit smoke breaks)
Offered security chap a lift home and, on route, got a call from MD (Minister of Defense; Medical Director, Major Dad, My Darling) that he was taking young patient to Unitas. Got home, fed dogs, shoved a cheese roll in my face, started laundry (um, this list gets long), when MD called and explained he was stranded at Unitas - his car was at patients house. Mad dash to hospital sans sirens. Finally got to put my feet up only after 9pm... and missed half of CSI.
At this rate, I could go into sleep therapy for two years and still not have caught up.
Patient will recover quickly.
Can't say the same for my bank balance (that should read deficit). EVERYBODY has decided to have a birthday, going away, house warming, mid winter, whatever thang this month. Me included. Darn.
If you're considering getting me a pressie, my wish list includes Nytol, Sleepeeze and a comfy pillow. No alarm clocks.
Saturday, 09 June 2007
What upset me this week
Crime
Another neighbour was shot this week. Not fatal, thank God, but why?
Strike
I've been sympathetic and supportive of higher wages for our essential services and teachers, however, the violence and intimidation has left a bitter taste. Durban Ambo's suspended? Schools being trashed? Threatening the safety of the kids? All bets are off!
Wednesday's Traffic
Took me 2 hours to travel 5km. Just plain crazy. Don't blame the rain - blame the inconsiderate idiots who blocked all the intersections, rear ended stationary cars, drove on the pavements and in emergency lanes and straight into oncoming traffic.
Another neighbour was shot this week. Not fatal, thank God, but why?
Strike
I've been sympathetic and supportive of higher wages for our essential services and teachers, however, the violence and intimidation has left a bitter taste. Durban Ambo's suspended? Schools being trashed? Threatening the safety of the kids? All bets are off!
Wednesday's Traffic
Took me 2 hours to travel 5km. Just plain crazy. Don't blame the rain - blame the inconsiderate idiots who blocked all the intersections, rear ended stationary cars, drove on the pavements and in emergency lanes and straight into oncoming traffic.
New Blog all ready to rock & roll
I finally won over the procrastinator and set up a blog. Pretty fun stuff. Hope you enjoy.
Keep comments above the belt.
Keep comments above the belt.
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