Bite Me

My boss is one of a kind (or maybe not). I've been under the weather for a few days and, yesterday, decided to end my martyr mode and stay in bed... which I should have done ages ago. Back at work today. No words of consolation, commiseration or empathy. Nope. I was simply reminded to fill in my leave form. You can feel the love.

My boss enjoys nothing more than finding an excuse to kak me out for something. I play being the fall-guy and then proving my boss wrong. It's not a game I choose to play but, hey, what do you do when you're on the field? You stick to the rules and kick butt. You can feel the love.

Snow what !!!

Huge excitement today. It snowed in Joburg. MD phones to make sure I catch the spectacle. Keep in mind that I've never seen real snow. I rush outside - nothing. Drive to work - nothing. Not a snowflake. Not a patch of white. Nada, nothing, zip. Everyone arrives late at the office because... they've been taking photos and playing in the snow. The biggest patch of ice I saw was the one on my windscreen.
This evening, MD gives me an ice ball in a plastic packet - my token snowball. That sucks.
I was VERY tempted to throw it at him... but I'm a pacifist.

So. For the Record. I have still not seen nor touched REAL SNOW.

Oh. Special message for crackpot who drives Audi. I'm guessing you've now learnt that throwing boiling water on your windscreen was not a crackerjack move.

Bigfoot

I need to Upgrade my bakkie like this. It would make my commute so much more fun, especially when the taxis try to cut me off or stop suddenly.

Pot holes (yeah, those slag gates) won't be a problem anymore.

Undercover parking could be a challenge.

Bite me.

Familiar Faces

The Koeksisters got together again, this time with some new faces. I met my second cousins for the first time. No doubt that they are family. We all look alike and share outsized feet. It was also strange to share stories and realise we have similar perceptions and experiences.
I hope to see a lot more of them in the future.

Aaarrrggghhhh - School Holidays

The great thing about school holidays is the less congested traffic. Uummm, Yep. That's about it.
The brat is back from boarding school. Yes, I'm one of those cruel parents you read about. Actually, she digs boarding school. If it's cool for Harry Potter and Spud, it's cool for her. Now I just pray my washing machine lasts the week, my house lasts two weeks, my bank overdraft lasts three weeks and my patience lasts 10 minutes. The phone bill is not up for discussion - THERE IS NO PHONE. The dictator has spoken.
It took Miss Sassy less than one hour to get marching orders to her room. I know the routine. We'll repeat this pattern on a non random basis until forever. Teenage girls!!! And I was an angel. Honest. Ask my Mom. Ya, the one who concussed me with the breadboard.

Bloody Facebook

Spending way too much time searching and chatting. It's crazy mon. My brain is seizing up. I'm putting myself on Facebook diet.
Wonder if they have a group for this? Gotta go check... see ya later.

Almost killed by someone else's STUPIDITY

I am SO MAD but happy to still be in the land of the living and being able to write this.
Driving home from work today. Single lane traffic. White Golf in front followed by overlong articulated truck followed by empty brick transport truck (type with crane) and then myself. Traffic moving slowly so when the road opens up to two lanes, the Golf and articulated keep left and I follow the brick truck on the right, both of us accelerating to pass. The Golf (@$$hole) decides to turn right (yeah, from the left lane), no indicator (naturally) and stops dead in our lane because there is oncoming traffic. Brick truck and myself hit brakes. Have to because we can't move left or right. The brick truck's backend sways from side to side. I'm still treading the brakes to the floor, tap style to avoid a skid, changing down super quick, somehow manage to hit the emergency lights too and preparing handbrake... then the articulated truck swerves onto sand shoulder to avoid swerving brick truck. I sense the impending jackknife but, miraculously, the driver accelerates out of it. Engines screaming, tires squealing, dust and smoke. Unbelievably, the motorists behind see what's happening and fall back. @$$hole is oblivious to this scenario and still parked sideways (no, I don't know why), sans indicators, in our lane. I stopped a metre behind the brick truck. Whew! The articulated moves on and the traffic behind allows me to pass on the left. When I do pass, I see the brick truck has managed to stop a balls hair from the Golf, who is still unaware of the 5m high 20 ton truck, now less a couple inches of rubber, kissing his right side.
Here's the punch. The road that @$$hole wants to turn into is a one way... yes, you guessed right.
Will the guys that developed ABS brakes please accept my prayer of thanks.
Ditto those patient dudes that put up with me every so often at Advanced Driving school.
Ditto the two truck drivers that kept it cool.
As for the @$$hole in the white Golf... if you want to commit suicide, do it at home. I hate you.

BTW did you know you don't get insurance discount anymore for Advanced Driving?

Another year older and deeper in debt.

Time to reflect

Things I don’t want to do
Bungee jump
Be in a large crowd
Go to jail

Things I’d like to do
Travel overseas
Touch real snow
Enjoy a honeymoon
Experience a spa pamper session with the works
Give up smoking
Write a best selling book
Own and drive a ‘green’ car
Hold my grandchild

Things I don’t want to do again
Get motherless drunk
Getting taken for granted
Get in serious debt
Abseiling
Face an elephants stampede and the car won’t start
Being shot at or hijacked
Being assaulted by bereaved parent
Having to call the cops
Delivering another sick baby and the mom is dying of AIDS

Things I’m glad I did although it was tough
Being a foster Mom
Training as an Emergency Medic
Leaving an abusive relationship
Taking responsibility for serious debt and paying off every last cent, interest included.
Ran a marathon
Leaving a bad, destructive job with no new job ready and waiting
Confronting alcoholic family
Euthenizing our badly injured and sick animals
Saying NO and sticking with it

And the Best
My friend, partner, husband (not enough words to describe this awesome man)
My daughter (melts my heart and pushes my buttons)
My mom (my anchor, the strongest woman I know)
Being nuzzled so gently by a wild giraffe
Being adored and weighed down by our dogs and cats
Laughing with friends, usually into the wee hours of the morning

Someone, please prescribe me Dormican

I am beyond tired. This is ridiculous.
Only left work at 8pm last night because the West Wing wanted information but could not quite communicate what information they wanted. Too exhausted to tap my psychic abilities, I used the tried and trusted technique - give them EVERYTHING. Hopefully, now that they have Everything, they'll leave me alone for a while.
No sooner had I collected take-out dinner (again) when the calls came in. Shooting. Another neighbour. She is out of theatre and in ICU. Critical but stable. The $#@!, known on politically correct parlance as 'the perpetrators', ran from the scene and then shot a motorist and passenger. Nothing was taken at any of these scenes. No further news.
Only got to bed after 1am.
My 2c. Theft was not a motive. These are terrorists. They are carrying heavy calibre, targeting their victims when they know they are home (dinner time).
Vent over. Off to bed. Good night.

Monday, what can I say :{

No hot water for starters. But. I'm an old hand at living maplotter style so it was out with the gas and 'voila!', one hot bath with bubbles and a lekker cup of coffee for good measure. Still made it to work on time.
Work, work, work,. (the commas are my legit smoke breaks)
Offered security chap a lift home and, on route, got a call from MD (Minister of Defense; Medical Director, Major Dad, My Darling) that he was taking young patient to Unitas. Got home, fed dogs, shoved a cheese roll in my face, started laundry (um, this list gets long), when MD called and explained he was stranded at Unitas - his car was at patients house. Mad dash to hospital sans sirens. Finally got to put my feet up only after 9pm... and missed half of CSI.
At this rate, I could go into sleep therapy for two years and still not have caught up.
Patient will recover quickly.
Can't say the same for my bank balance (that should read deficit). EVERYBODY has decided to have a birthday, going away, house warming, mid winter, whatever thang this month. Me included. Darn.
If you're considering getting me a pressie, my wish list includes Nytol, Sleepeeze and a comfy pillow. No alarm clocks.

What upset me this week

Crime
Another neighbour was shot this week. Not fatal, thank God, but why?
Strike
I've been sympathetic and supportive of higher wages for our essential services and teachers, however, the violence and intimidation has left a bitter taste. Durban Ambo's suspended? Schools being trashed? Threatening the safety of the kids? All bets are off!
Wednesday's Traffic
Took me 2 hours to travel 5km. Just plain crazy. Don't blame the rain - blame the inconsiderate idiots who blocked all the intersections, rear ended stationary cars, drove on the pavements and in emergency lanes and straight into oncoming traffic.

New Blog all ready to rock & roll

I finally won over the procrastinator and set up a blog. Pretty fun stuff. Hope you enjoy.
Keep comments above the belt.